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According to him I was the worst kind of nigger because I couldn't pick a side. I never told my mom or anybody because I felt like I couldn't.

I never wanted to complain to the women in my family because I thought my struggles would never equate to theirs. When I was in high school, I had never stared at my mother with as much admiration as I did when I started to hate my skin.

Her melanin glowed to me and at a time when some girls my age wanted a boyfriend or bigger breasts, I wanted dark skin like my mother's.

I would often look at her and wonder how someone could call her skin ugly or unappealing when I looked at it and saw pure gold. I grew up repulsed by the way my skin left visible acne scars all over my face and the way hair showed so easily on my body.

My skin had became a sheet of just utter hate on my body that I wanted to tear off. I couldn't tell anybody because it was unheard of, you know?

You never hear about a little light skinned girl wanting to be dark skinned. It's always the other way around. It's always the little dark girl picking the light skinned baby doll and believing that it is the most complete and fascinating thing in the world.

The girls I went to school with growing up didn't like me. I never blamed them though. It wasn't their fault rather what they were taught, maybe by their parents and then from their grandparents and then their grandparent's parents.

They were programmed to believe that my black was beautiful and their's wasn't. It's crazy how they hated me due to my skin tone and due to preconceived notions about me 'thinking I was all that' when I would have traded skin tones with them in a heart beat.

I thought to myself that I would fit right in without a second look. See, at a HBCU the colors vary from white to the most chocolate brown and it doesn't matter what color you are.

In college, people are much more mature and educated. There wasn't blatant colorism but it still existed subtly.

It was being in History , learning about the Bantus and speaking in class and everyone turning around with a face I knew all too well.

It says "Are you even fully black? Why are you talking? The white man separated us: darks and lights. We're so caught up on these preconceived notions of each other, we fail to realize the big picture.

Not to mention, black men sometimes don't make it any better. As black women, we are pitted against each other based off of how we look: lightskin, darkskin, slim, thick, tall, short, weave, natural and the infamous good girl vs girl who shows a little more skin comparison.

Hate has been so imbedded in us, blacks hate other blacks for being black. We forget that as black women our struggles are much more alike than we admit.

No one women's struggle is less important than another one's. When it comes down to it we all share bloodlines with greats like Fanny Lou Hamer, Ella Baker, Dorothy Heights and Harriet Tubman, and each day we stand in the merit of their work.

We progress and prosper while at the same time facing adversity, from being told we aren't quite enough of this or too much of that.

Despite these things and the various shades that we may come in we are all still black and are the similar in essence.

I grew to love the skin I'm in. All the acne scars and all the hair. I still look at my mother in amazement.

I want my skin tone to be celebrated by most men not just one who happens to settle for me. You clearly lack confidence. Why do you think a man should have to settle for you?

I hate to say it but most of the men saying that they prefer lighter skin tones are saying this because that is the desirable image portrayed by the media.

A truly great man will not see your skin tone but your character. You seem to be disregarding some of the men saying that skin tone doesn't even matter to them.

And that's how it should be in my opinion. I'm your skin tone and I've had attention from guys, but the difference is that I'm comfortable and confident with my skin and I don't let it determine my dating prospects.

I'm looking for at least half of the guys to say they prefer darkskin, not the skin tone doesn't matter BS. That isn't good enough for me.

Lightskin women get to hear all the time that their color is preferred, why can I? Why am I always excluded and made to feel less desirable?

Unfortunately you can't change what a guy prefers. You come across as extremely bitter. Why do you care what most guys like? Yes, I'm extremely bitter because most men do not prefer me.

I'm something that they settle for but I'm supposed to be content with that. I'll just let you wallow in your own self pity then.

You're not helping yourself by thinking in this way. Your skin tone is not be all and end all of your being.

That's all I have to say. Do you think in the future dark women will be bred out since most men dont prefer us?

Based on the responses from men in this thread and in general I see it everyday. This is 14 guys out of the millions of men in the world Plus, majority of these guys told your skin tone doesn't matter as much cause it is features and personality too.

The reason light skin girls seem to be preferred is also cause they are flaunted in music videos and magazines making them seem like the ideal skin tone.

To against your point, where do you think these light skin woman came from? They came from a dark skin person and a white person.

There were not many light skins until white men started having sex with black woman or black men having sex with white woman.

So, remember that, people are attracted to dark skin woman. Yes, there were white men who had sex with darkskin black women but it doesn't change the reality that most men prefer lightskin.

They were attracted but not AS attracted to lightskin which bothers me. It's something that really bothers me and cuts deep into my soul. You can't change the world, you need to stop bitching about it and move on.

Oh well, some men won't like you. You probly missed out on many men who will like you. You can't change your skin either so stopping being jealous and envious.

Others on here tried to make your feel better, but you won't even listen. Maybe its your personality that's keeping you from attracting the men you want.

I'm upset because I feel less as a woman. I'm tired of seeing men in the media, online and real life constantly preferring and choosing lightskinned women as partners.

I always feel inadequate and for once in my life would like to know what it feels like to have my beauty affirmed. To be apart of the chosen class of women that most men find ideal.

Being upset never changes anything, you have to do actions. You can't change who you are and there's no reason to put yourself down. Nobody else has told you these things to put you down, but you tell yourself this and because of this you feel less of a woman.

I feel sometimes light skin guys have it easy cause all the girls are attracted to them, but I don't sit around bitching about it.

Society tells me i'm not as beautiful or worthy as lightskinned women. Who gives a flying fuck? Stop worrying about everything people say.

People have talked about our whole race, that doesn't mean I let what they say get to me. Are you this: thyblackman.

Brown skin is not a preferred skin tone. Very few men even chose that skin tone as their ideal preference. I am Oprah Winfrey's skin tone.

You just wasted my time completely. You're not even dark skin, why are your associating as dark skin then. Brown skin is not even very far from light skin.

And who tf are you to say that? First, not all men have ideal skin tones. Many guys have already tried to tell you that, but you won't listen.

Different men like different woman, deal with it. TrackisLife I wouldn't bother anymore, she's clearly not prepared to listen to the help and advice people are giving her.

Darkskin is brownskin. What the heck are you talking about? Since when is Oprah Winfrey and Kelly Rowland not darkskin?

Do you see black men preferring brown women NO. Dark skin is not brown skin I'm brown skin. There's a difference.

I know girls that are even darker than that in person and they are very beautiful and have pretty eyes.

How can you prove black men don't prefer their own race? Just stop You must live beneath a rock if you dont notice most black men who express their preference for lightskin or white girls.

Do you see the type of women most black male entertainers have? I would date a darkskin girl cause race doesn't matter to me. That first picture I showed you, she is a very hot dark skin girl.

Do you know those women aren't shit to those men? They are just bitches to them. There are plenty of videos with brown skin girls too, plenty.

Cause brown skin isn't too far from light skin. Some of the hottest women are brown skin. Lauren London is biracial and lightskinned.

The only dark girl is Kelly Rowland. None of them have broad features like me. I have features like Lupita Nyongo.

Lupita Nyongo has gorgeous skin. I always hear many people say how gorgeous she is both white and black.

As a matter of fact she's on cover girl and on plenty of magazines. It's all about being confident and having a great personality.

Men will avoid saying they prefer darkskin, some will claim they care more about boobs, butts, hips, but never that you prefer darkskin.

I've been with white to dark chocolate girls. I don't have a preference for skin tone. Again, with this I don't have a preference crap.

I want to date a guy who strongly prefers and idolizes my skin tone, not someone who doesn't have a preference or dont care.

There are chocolate chasers out there lol. And by brownskin, do you mean like kerry Washington? Kerry Washington is lightskinned and has narrow features.

See, women like me are not even thought of when you think of dark. That's the sad part. Oprah is definitely pretty and Kelly is lovely.

You shouldn't be having much problema dating if that's you're skin tone. Lupita gets all white boys lol and she's darker than both people you mentioned.

You have to pick. What type of facial features and skin tone you like on black girls? I wanted to know why you don't prefer dark women, what makes our skin tone less appealing?

I just find it frustrating that by default I am what most men would settle for and not be ideal. But I guess I should be content with being 2nd best.

Not one man has said he preferred darkskin so far. Why is that? Why am I the least preferred color? Nobody had to prefer a skin tone, this man just said skin tone is not his biggest factor, why are you asking?

Not one man can say "I prefer darkskin". They always cop out and say they dont have a preference. I dont date black guys cause they all prefer lightskin, mixed race or white girls now.

Why would I date a black guy and produce a child that is going to suffer like I am and not be able to marry?

Because people aren't magnets. What black guys prefer doesn't impact what white guys prefer. Because most men in real life feel this way and it makes me really upset and angry.

I feel ignored, irrelevant, undesirable and unworthy because my skin is not light. And any man who dates me I wonder if he is settling for me cause he couldn't get a lightskinned woman.

It is important. If my skin tone is not preferred, how am I going to date, marry? All women want to feel appreciated. I want to hear men say they prefer darkskin as much as i hear them say they like lightskin.

It's like this everywhere. Even black men prefer lightskin. I'm left with nothing. Besides why would i want to date a black man and have children who are going to be my color and darker only for them to suffer.

I dont want to have a dark daughter who is going to be reminded that she is not the ideal nor as beautiful as light women. I was pretty much told in so many ways that men settle for women like me.

I am never their preferred choice. Asker, here goes another guy preferring dark which you're not , but you'll probly ignore this and continue ranting.

Asker, I dream of someday going back to Barbados and seeing the beautiful willowy island girls again. It's not that I don't like darker skin, I'm just turned on much more by lighter skin.

This especially: i. Theending, so why can't darkskin be just as much of a turn on? I dont even know why I even exist since so few men find my skin tone ideal.

It can be a turn on too, it's just that I'm more often turned on by light skin. I can't help that. In the end it doesn't matter that much since the personality is more important in being attracted to someone.

I don't knowwww anon : Maybe it's a psychological or cultural thing, who knows? Don't worry about it so much. I promise it's not as big of a deal as you think it is.

It IS a big deal. It's a huge deal. My confidence, self esteem, worth and purpose is tied into my skin tone that most men dont think is worth crap.

I dont even know why I exist since most men dont even prefer my skin tone. It's not worth crap. I'm pretty sure no one said that.

Your existence isn't defined by your ability to attract men you know. And you can. As long as you love yourself and you have confidence, you're still attractive.

Focus on that, and not the fact that you don't have x or y quality. Their features are closer to white which is my preference. I'd still go out with a darker skinned girl if she matched my criteria.

It sucks not being a guy's top preference. Why is lightskin your preference and not dark? What's wrong with it? Because I'm white and I've always just preferred lighter skinned women.

You need to realize I'm just one guy out of billions. There are guys out there who prefer dark skinned. But a lot of guys feel the way you do that's what im asking.

A lot of dark black guys share the same preference as you too. I just want to know why my skin tone is not more celebrated. Because people tend to gravitate to people who are similar to themselves.

Why is it that most black women prefer black men? Same exact reason. Black men don't always gravitate to black women, they date out all the time and prefer light skin, so explain that?

It's still a small percentage. Majority of people stick to their own race. The ones who do mix are the minority statistically. It's not a bad thing at all its just how things are.

Plus black guys usually date lighter skinned women for a trophy. Many black guys prefer lightskinned women when they do date inside their own race.

Why is my skin tone not a trophy? What isn't it prized? You shouldn't be worried with people who don't make you a priority and worry about the guys that will.

I am a brownskinned Black girl and feel that I would have an easier time dating if I were lighter in complexion. I notice that even white guys tend to slightly prefer lightskinned Black women if they are available.

I just want to know what shade do you prefer when dating black women? Most men do not prefer darkskinned black women, they'd all rather be in relationships or married to lightskinned women.

I'll never be as sexy as beautiful nor have as much worth as fairskinned women. I'm something that most men settle for if I have "nice features" or if I'm not next to a lightskinned women cause they will pass me over.

I have no idea what I even exist why aren't women like me extinct? Maybe the purpose of my existance is to just be a breeder?

I had to take a day off from work so I could calm down. It's just that I suffer from self esteem and confidence issues stemming from feeling rejected by men because of my skin tone.

Sometimes at work when I see men approaching lightskin, mixed and white women more often to chat with I'd get so upset that I can't even concentrate.

It triggers feelings of inadequacy and rejection.

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